We're Still Waiting

This is a little bit behind- a backlog, if you will- of occurrences since I left the continental United States two weeks ago. I came with Creative Outlet Dance Theater to Dutch St. Maarten for a 3 week summer intensive.

"We're Still Waiting" pretty much accurately describes how things go here on the islands. For a bunch of born and bred City dwellers as we are (okay I'm not born or bred, but I definitely qualify as City) that "waiting" bit took some getting used to.

        Life on the island moves SLOW!!! It seems like no one has anywhere to be until they get there. The only thing that moves reasonable fast is the driving. For people who don't have anywhere to be there sure do drive like they do. I've seen all of maybe 2 street lights on this island. Some other intersections have roundabouts. Most have nothing at all. Which encourages mildly frightening (to say the least) driving practices.

Now imagine, you're on a bus, amidst the mildly frightening driving practices. Going up and down and swirling round and round the hills of this 37 sq. foot island. Where anything (goats, geese, dogs, cats, cocks - yes I did just say "cocks" instead of rooster- etc.) can jump into the unpredictable flow of traffic. We're on an island tour, courtesy of a St. Maarten native, who has her own personal touring entourage at her disposable --Everything was free, which is the best price.

The Tour:
This island tour took us 5 and a half hours. But don't worry, because 4 of those hours were spent on a nude beach and a market on the French side of the island. Apparently the currency of St. Maarten used to be salt. Yeah. I know. "I'll take a Johnny cake, and a croissant, thanks." "Sure that'll be a half pound of salt." ORRRR "I'll take a Johnny cake and a croissant, thanks." "No way mon. You're not worth your salt." The plantation homes. When you think plantation homes I think those huge antebellum affairs of the south. With wraparound porches and what not. Not here. Their plantation homes were about the size of a barn on a southern plantation. Surrounded by a ton of land. And absolutely nothing else.
Our tour guide pointed out a lovely flower to us "the Pride of Barbados" Aptly named because it is in fact the Pride of Barbados.... Who knew?

The French Side:
Is a whole five square miles larger than the Dutch side. They use Euros which the exchange rate is like double the currency on the Dutch side. They have a bay with a ferry that goes to the island Anguilla and nude beaches!!! You can't gamble on the French side. I think there are at least 5 casinos on the Dutch side. The only gambling allowed on the French side? Wait for it.... cock fighting. yes. yes, indeed.

The Market:
We pulled up into this little downtown type area. There was a mall. Some restaurants. And a flea market. And a man selling coconut water. The real kind. From the actual coconuts. The market was unfortunately lacking. I didn't spend much time there because let's be real: if you've seen one Caribbean flea market you've seen them all. And once you've seen one stand, in that one market, you literally have a fairly neat grasp on everything else for sale. How many tropical dresses/jewelry does one really need? Instead of shopping I spent the hour before noon drinking.

The Beach:
Nude. Enough said.  There's something particularly liberating about laying out topless. It's quite relaxing.  You should try it. I spent 28 dollars on lunch at the beach. Twenty. Eight. Dollars. For Mahi-Mahi. And Rum. Okay, so Rum makes everything better but still. That lunch was over the top for me.

The Kid.
The best part of the tour by far (aside from sleeping naked on the beach) was 5-year-old Soleil Gaines. Son of Jamel Gaines, artistic director and Bahiyah Sayyed-Gaines. Cutest kid. Smart. Funny. He's adorable. You know how I normally don't like children, and dealing with them is, in my mind, the best birth control ever, but he makes me want to have a kid. NOT NOW! But you know some day... I want my kid to be that smart. and cute. and funny. I want people to love my kid like we love Soleil. He's such an engaging child. Because after the tour he demanded (yes, demanded) that we go to the movies with him. And we did.

It was a lovely Saturday, after that first week from hell. Stay tuned for more adventures and misadventures from the beautiful Island of St. Maarten as the rest is still UNwritten...